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My D Blog Week Favourite Things :: Day 7

Today’s Task: share a few of our favorite thingsc from the week. This can be anything from a #DBlogWeek post you loved, a fantastic new-to-you blog you found, a picture someone included in a post that spoke to you, or comment left on your blog that made you smile. Anything you liked is worth sharing!

When I started to think about writing today’s post… This came to mind… “You get a car, you get a car, you get a car… “We’re going to AUUUUSSSSTTTTRRRRRAAAAIIILLLLIAAAA!!!!” (If
In case you’ve lived under a rock for the last decade, like my husband apparently has, that was my Oprah during her Favourite Things show impression) 😉

All kidding aside though, this week has been wonderful!
Here are my favourite things:

1. This comment made me ball my eyes out! https://coriannh.wordpress.com/2014/05/15/what-brings-me-down-day-3-dblogweek/comment-page-1/#comment-25

2. Connecting with so many people all in one week! Some of them I’ve been admiring from the sidelines for a few years now! Like Mike at http://www.thediabeticscornerbooth.com, Karen at http://bittersweetdiabetes.com/, Kelly at http://diabetesaliciousness.blogspot.com/

3. A shout out from Amy T at http://www.diabetesmine.com

4. Discovered lots of new blogs. Two that stood out for me were, Sarah Grace at http://www.coffeeandinsulin.com and Kelley at http://www.coffeeandinsulin.com

Thank you everyone! I really hope that I get to know you all better and maybe even meet you IRL!!

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Saturday snapshots :: D Blog Week :: Day 6

I almost forget this one. Living in the city where Insulin was discovered! Is it a coindidence that our citiy's icon looks like a giant syringe?
I almost forget this one. Living in the city where Insulin was discovered! Is it a coindidence that our citiy’s icon looks like a giant syringe?
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I take a lot of photos on my phone as I travel through life. So for today’s post I scrolled through my camera roll and chose some pics that show what diabetes looks like in my life. I’ve always been trying to do a #100happydaysdiabetes challenge on twitter (before dblog week started and took over my life lol)so I had lots to choose from.

Working out regularly to stay healthy
Working out regularly to stay healthy
Checked my bg mid boot camp and dropped my bag! I thought the test strip confetti was hilarious.. My fellow boot campers probably thought I was having some sort of diabetic "episode" lol. Cue the next image.
Checked my bg mid boot camp and dropped my bag! I thought the test strip confetti was hilarious.. My fellow boot campers probably thought I was having some sort of diabetic “episode” lol. Cue the next image.
Well it's not really awesome but our community is
Well it’s not really awesome but our community is
Making really awesome friends who also have Footie fanatic syndrome.
Making really awesome friends who also have Footie fanatic syndrome.
Eating healthy most of the time... Usually when my wonderful husband whips something up.I said most of the time... Yes I am eating bbq in above photo including corn bread  and it was damn good!
Eating healthy most of the time… Usually when my wonderful husband whips something up.I said most of the time… Yes I am eating bbq in above photo including corn bread and it was damn good!
Our wedding day... Another dream come true <3
Our wedding day… Another dream come true ❤

Having a blast with my niece and nephew. D can't stop us!
Having a blast with my niece and nephew. D can’t stop us!
Just like we've always done! This is me and my bro in Florida with mom and our Pa. D was always with us but I remember more of the good times than the bad times when I look back now.
Just like we’ve always done! This is me and my bro in Florida with mom and our Pa. D was always with us but I remember more of the good times than the bad times when I look back now.
Celebrating these times
Celebrating these times
Remembering this. Always.
Remembering this. Always.

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Mantras and More :: day 4 :: D BlogWeek

Today(actually yesterday’s) topic for d blog week is Mantras and More.

Today’s task: “share what gets you through a hard day? Or, more specifically, a hard diabetes day? Something positive you tell yourself, or mantras, or what you fall back on to get you through. Maybe we’ve done that and we can help others do it too? (Thanks to Meri of Our Diabetic Life for suggesting this topic.)”

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Woo Hoo I love this topic!!! Was super busy yesterday doing a whole bunch of awesome stuff so I am posting this a day late!

About 10 years ago I discovered meditation and found something I had no idea I was looking for! I also got into yoga around the same time.

Diabetes can cause me to be moody biatch sometimes. You know, that moment when you are overcome with emotion and you stop in the middle of it and think, I better test my blood sugar? That’s happened to me before. Sometimes it’s because my blood sugar is high. And sometimes it’s because I’m a human being I guess.

The other day I woke up feeling so irritable that I could barely stand myself. Like I said in my last post, I used to run away from everything. Especially my feelings about being a diabetic and being “different”. My mom was told when I was young that I would have a deep hatred within me for/from the disease. I’m not sure if that is a medical fact but I definitely went in and out of phases in my late teens and early twenties that would support that theory.

When I started practicing yoga and meditation I started to heal that void inside of me. It grounded me and reconnected me to my true self. I started writing gratitude lists regularly and focusing on all the good things and blessings in my life.

I came across this Eleanor Roosevelt quote around the time of my spiritual awakening,
“The future belongs to those who BELIEVE in the BEAUTY of their DREAMS.”
When I meditate I get to stop and think about the things I believe in like happiness, love, hope, acceptance, faith and kindness. I think about the awesome people in my life, the opportunities I have to grow and learn, meet new people, the adventures I get live. And the more I focused on all that juiciness the more I seemed to attract to me. My dreams started to come true!

So the other day when I woke up on the wrong side of the bed, I grabbed my iPod and hit play on one of my Oprah and Deepak meditations and slowly but surely I snapped out of it.

Wouldn’t it be awesome to do a DOC group meditation?? All of us from around the globe stopping at the same time to breath and send out good vibes. Maybe we can meditate for the cure?? Maybe the universe will answer our call?? Maybe our biggest dream
Of all could come true too?

Let me know if you’re interested…

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What Brings Me Down Day 3 DBlogWeek

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The topic for today is What Brings Me Down. May is Mental Health Month so now seems like a great time to explore the emotional side of living with, or caring for someone with, diabetes. What things can make dealing with diabetes an emotional issue for you and / or your loved one, and how do you cope?

Being a t1D sucks. We all know that. I’ve been living with it for 30 years. I could probably write a list of things that bring me down so long that I’d still be here writing it 30 years from now.

What I didn’t realize until three years ago was how much it hurts to be a person who loves a person with T1D.

It was about this time of year, we had celebrated my nieces first birthday about 4 months earlier and her brother’s third birthday had just passed. I was over at my brother’s hanging out with him and my sweeties, who as of now are the closest things I have to children. My brother says to me, ” I think she has diabetes.” I look at him in disbelief and sluff it off (him and I can be both be a little paranoid about health issues at times). I respond, “Why would you think that?”
“She’s really been going though a lot of diapers.”
“Nah, I don’t think so, you are probably paranoid. Just take her to the doctor and find out for sure.”
The next day at work my cell phone rings and it’s him. Why is he calling me in the middle of the work day? My brother is not a “call and chat” kind of guy.
(I am tearing up as I try to relive this phone call…)
Through tears, he tells me her blood is 18. I try to reason with him. “Maybe she had a big breakfast? Maybe it was a mistake. Check it again.”
I went through so many emotions. I wrote about it last year http://wp.me/p359TO-e

Clearly until three years ago, I only knew and felt that I was the one with the illness. I was the one feeling the lows, getting pricked and poked, being controlled and so on that I never really quite understood until I felt it myself how much it hurt when someone you love so much is diagnosed with this life altering illness. Someone so small and precious. When I think about what brings me down the most about diabetes it’s that she has it. She has to feel all the feelings that we all know so well. Her brother has to wrap his little boy mind around it and her parents haven’t had a full nights sleep in three years. For some reason I can deal with the fact that I have had to live this life but as much as I try to be positive about everything and know that she will be fine too, I still hate (hate is a strong word but hey, if the shoe fits) that anyone especially my niece has to deal with this. Hasn’t my family been through enough with me?

As I write this though, I think of this community and I know that you all feel the same way. There are people in this community who have more than one child with D. Parents who have D and also have children with D. It just doesn’t seem fair! I guess that is the mystery of life. And now that I am super bummed from thinking and writing about this, I have to switch my thinking around. That’s how I cope. I have to find gifts even though it’s not fair. Dealing with life on life’s terms and accepting that this is how it is and that I can either make the best of it or let it swallow me whole.
Why not my family? Why not me? Everyone in this big ol’ world has something to deal with.

And although the cure is not here yet the advances in technology have come a long way and complications in T1Ds are declining. So to cope, I count the days blessings and not the days worries as much as possible. I realize that I have an opportunity to be a role model to my niece. I want her to see that people with D are normal (mostly haha), and can do ANYTHING their hearts desire. I want her to see a healthy diabetic who lives a long amazing life, who is happy and doesn’t let D bring her down. But I also want her to know that it’s ok to not be ok and to be sad sometimes too because that is normal. She inspires me to take the best care of myself as possible.

There are many ways to cope with feeling down, but sometimes the best way is just to feel the feelings and not always try to run away from them. Usually they pass just like dark clouds and the sun always comes out again.

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#dBlogWeek Poetry Tuesday day

Accepting me for me

When I drop so low and can’t go on
When I go up high and feel so low
How does it feel? I cant explain

When I try so hard and get nowhere
When the awful thoughts come creeping in
No one really understands

When I want to be fine
When I want to be heard
It’s something only we can get

When It’s not the best
When it’s not the worst
It’s still with me at every step

When you take my joy
When you take my fun
I change my thoughts and carry on

Accepting me for me

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Change the World – DBlog Week

This will be my first year particpating in #DBlogWeek,  I am a little apprehensive. What can I contribute to this big online world of witty, charming, smart and funny dblogs? This seems to be a recurring theme in my life. After 30 years with Diabetes and so many lessons and accomplishments along the way, I still have this sense of not being good enough. I wonder if this is because I grew up being different, never having good enough blood sugars, and being told about all the things I couldn’t do and would never do? 

I’ve heard it said that FEAR can either stand for Face Everything And Recover or Forget Everything and Run. I used to do the latter a lot. Today, however, that’s not how I roll. So here I am, contributing despite what my inner critic tells me and although we can never “recover” from T1D, we can try our best to focus on the blessings in our life. Like the DOC for example. This community has made me feel part of something bigger than myself and picks me up when I’m feeling down. Just like D camp did for me when I was 8 years old. Last night I found a box of keepsakes that my mom saved for me and in there was my certicficate from Camp Huronda for my first self-injection () and also my kindergarten report card from June 1985, 7 months after being diagnosed.

It reads:
“Cori-Ann, you have not let your illness hold you back. You have made a fine effort this year. I’ll miss your cheerful ways. ” (before that it also says that I enjoyed my part in the rhythm band and had a good sense of beat. And that I worked hard in the gym… lol). 

So on that note, I’d like to say that if I could change the world, yes I’d obviously cure Diabetes. But since that’s not available at this time, I would ask that we all stay cheerful and and not let Diabetes hold us back from anything in life, that we keep dancing to our own beat and work hard at the gym (WITH NO LOWS!!).

 report card

 

 

 

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#100happydaysdiabetes

So I haven’t blogged in a year or so… whoops! But I am really feeling like I want to connect with my diabetes people these days.
12 days ago I started the #100happydays social media challenge on my facebook page. I’m loving it. I really do try to look at all the blessings I have in life so this was a good fit for me. Even on those days when my bgs are like a roller coaster, I am emotional from a spike, or just feel like throwing my pump off my balcony, there is always something to be happy about!
This morning I came up with the idea to do a #100happydaysdiabetes challenge for the Diabetes Online Community. Can I actually find things about diabetes to be happy about for 100 days in a row??
As I ask myself this questions – all the negative, sad thoughts I have around D just came crashing in! Ughhh!
But I think I can do this!
Not that I have any readers right now (other than my mom and sister-in-law, who aren’t on social media) but if you do happen to stumble across this post – and want to join me – please do! I would love to see what you have to share!
I’ll be posting the pics for the challenge on twitter ==>> @coriannh

Day 1 goes to making some great friends through the power of social media, the DOC (and words with friends) Me and Joanne at Disneyland last year!

#100happydaysdiabetes
#100happydaysdiabetes